Your tits are I can't wait for
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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