what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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