with your own penis?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
