Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
