Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
