We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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