I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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