Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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