Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
