kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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