i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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