Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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