oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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