I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
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