no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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