Sry I called you an 8
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Randomize
