They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
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