shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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