I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
