Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
