Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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