just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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