...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I can't turn off my feet"
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I just want to make out with him forever
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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