is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
