quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
