what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
