I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
a search helicopter?!
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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