Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I am mentally ready for anal.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
