Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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