i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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