yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I need water and some morals
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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