Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
