don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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