He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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