Will you blow on my dice?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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