she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
