You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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