I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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