:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
