I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I cut my penus on the lid.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize