I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize