Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
