I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
