we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
