You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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