I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Randomize
