White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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