Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
