Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize