bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
