So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
