we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
She bit a glass in half.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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